As Donald Trump transitions into the Oval Office as President of the United States, a brand new presidential cabinet will too.
Seventeen departments covering major aspects of our society today — homeland security, finance, education, agriculture, just to name a few — will all (likely) be filled with new individuals once President-Elect Trump takes his oath of office.
We don't know who those people will be just yet, but what if there was an alternate world where the government was run solely by NBA players? Who would be the Chief of Staff? The Secretary of State? Here are our best guesses.
President: LeBron James
This one is obvious. He may not be universally liked, similar to many presidents before him, but he is the most powerful figure in the land. When President LeBron has something important to say, the world listens. He is the beating heart of the land he rules – never takes a second off, provides opportunity to other branches of government, and without him everything collapses. He’s the most powerful man in the NBA world, something he’ll show off with a chasedown block that can decimate your favorite team. He appoints his own cabinet because he can.
Vice President: Kevin Durant
One major injury away from taking over the presidency, Kevin Durant spends his time leading the branch of government that butts heads with the President the most. He’s had aspirations to be in the oval office ever since he entered politics, however it’s unclear if he’ll ever make it. In the meantime, despite being the president’s No. 2, the two unintentionally develop a rivalry and the Vice President gets blood-thirsty for the power he’s forever lusted for. He rallies the Senate to back him in a policy coup, acting as a major roadblock between the president and his career legacy. The government stalls until the two are able to face each other in a dual nationally televised State of the Union address in June.
Secretary of State: Russell Westbrook
Often acting outside the jurisdiction of the presidency, the Secretary of State is here to preserve our way of life by developing foreign policy, advancing freedom, and creating a secure and beneficial world for his people and the international community. He is the hero who won’t ever get the credit he deserves and without question represents everything that makes his organization great to the rest of the world.
Secretary of the Treasury: Mike Conley Jr.
His main purpose is to collect revenue, produce money and formulate economic policy for future generations. It is no coincidence that Conley just happens to be the richest man in the government. He has set a financial precedent that has never been achieved in cabinet history — a $153 million salary.
Secretary of Defense: Kawhi Leonard
Good luck trying to penetrate these walls – an arsenal of the world’s most dangerous weapons awaits you.
Attorney General: Zach Randolph
He doesn’t make the law, but he enforces it and does so at his own interpretation. His purpose is to defend the ideologies and interests of the land and seek just punishment for criminals.
Secretary of the Interior: DeAndre Jordan
He's responsible for maintaining and defending the integrity of the nation’s most vulnerable and valuable cultural assets.
Secretary of Agriculture: Chris Paul
If you’re hungry, it is the Secretary of Agriculture’s job to feed you.
Secretary of Commerce: J.R. Smith
This individual is responsible for selling the nation’s economy and technology to nations worldwide. Smith sells “the life” and isn't afraid to lavishly spend to prove a point. Recession, depression, bull economy – it doesn’t matter, his sole purpose is to get shots up until one connects and a new partnership is established.
Secretary of Labor: Stephen Curry
Oversees work safety and fair pay for all. This department represents the working class citizens and is a representation of white collar influence that is being paid with blue collar compensation.
Secretary of Health and Human Services: Paul George
Health is something earned, not given. There's no one better to represent this vision than the man who has come the furthest in proving it to be true.
Secretary of Housing and Urban Development: John Wall
Winner of the 2016 Season-long NBA Cares Community Assist Award , Wall spends every waking minute making the community a better place to live.
Secretary of Transportation: Rajon Rondo
This individual’s responsibility is to implement the fastest, safest, most efficient and accessible transportation systems for everyone around them. Its leader is the motor that makes the nation's vehicle go. Assign his duties carefully, or immediate disaster awaits that no one is safe from.
Secretary of Energy: Draymond Green
If you’re in need of a spark, just flip the switch and call in the Secretary of Energy – he’ll provide enough to make sure your lights never turn off.
Secretary of Education: James Harden
Can dish out financial aid as needed, establishes policies on education, will teach you something new every time you see him.
Secretary of Veteran Affairs: Vince Carter
Oversees the care of the nation’s veterans and represents the interests of the elder statesmen who have served for the entirety of their lives.
Secretary of Homeland Security: Brad Stevens
When stuff hits the fan within the borders, this is who you want managing all potential and current threats to the country’s well-being.