The Dallas Cowboys ‘hired’ wrestling legend Sting as an intimidation coach

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The Dallas Cowboys got back on track last weekend with a win over the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, but no one in the NFC is scared of Dak Prescott & Co. these days. What the Cowboys could really use is an intimidation coach — and fortunately for Dallas WWE Hall of Famer Sting knows just the man for the job.

… it’s Sting. Sting’s the man for the job, in case you didn’t catch that one.

A typical day for Sting at the Cowboys offices includes getting harassed by security for trying to bring his bat into work, hunting and pecking at his keyboard while wearing his wrestling gloves and making sure that no one touches his beloved bat.

Seriously, don’t touch it, or he’ll treat you like you’re the nWo and he’s, well, Sting.

Now, if there are any theoretical physicists in the audience, I’d love for one of you to build a time machine and take us back to Starcade 1997 so Sting could earn the clean victory over Hulk Hogan he so rightfully deserved. Miss you, Stinger.

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